Friday, February 27, 2009

#100

This is my 100th post!! That is an exciting milestone. :-)

Everything always looks better on Friday afternoons at 3:00. Today was no exception. The stress and pressure I've been feeling all week went away this afternoon and I was able to enjoy a few hours with my husband out and about town.

We talked more about the kitties we saw last Saturday and DH called the shelter and our two babies are still there. We are going over on Sunday to meet them again and to play with them. Last Saturday they were too new to the shelter and wouldn't come out. I *think* we are going to be bringing them home Sunday too.... we will see!

My 100th post, no school tomorrow, and possibly new fur babies! Will post pictures if (when) they come home. Now it's off to do some writing for NBPTC- last group meeting tomorrow, it will all be over in less than a month (am both pleased and panicked about that).

Happy Friday!

Thursday, February 26, 2009

If I were normal...

Then I should have begun my period today. Instead my FF says that perhaps I am fertile again due to my temps. I am feeling really frustrated about this whole charting thing, I don't even understand what it should look like and what I am waiting for. I have had minimal fluctuation in temps ;the biggest one coming with my new thermometer (which I had to buy when my dog ate the first one) But seriously... does temping even WORK for someone with PCOS?!

DH and I want to try to do things as naturally as possible and from all the reading I've done the first step is learning my cycle. I am just really frustrated and perhaps I joined FF too soon because it's just giving me hope when I have no right to have hope at this point. And the worse part is, the closer it gets to the period FF thinks I *should* have the more obsessed I become with every little thing happening with my body.

Aughhh I am frustrated today. Thank goodness tomorrow is Friday. This weekend we are going out though with one of our many pregnant couple friends. I jokingly said to DH that I will be sharing a pitcher of margaritas with H and he got mad saying she was pregnant but that was my whole point. Then I get to drink them all.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Terrific Tuesdays OOPS!

Well I wrote my last post and totally forgot it is Terrific Tuesday!

Today was terrific because...
  • I got lots done on my NBPT writing- I am best when I am busy!
  • I sang Mama Mia! songs all the way to work. I rocked!!
  • My kiddos were all back today (many absent yesterday due to storm and late start)
  • Drama club is in full swing and I finished casting.
  • Some of my students colored George Washington brown today arguing that Barack Obama has skin that color why can't George Washington. I appreciated the logic even if it didn't fit with history.
  • I finally said NO to being on a committee. My colleagues looked shocked but I put my foot down and said I didn't have time.
I love Terrific Tuesdays!

Sorry ICLWers!

I don't really have much to say this week. It's been busy but not very interesting!

No snow day for me on Monday- we were one of two districts in our area who didn't cancel. Once I got to school though it was a nice day and I will be thankful in June.

I've been reading TCOYF and realizing just how little I knew about my own body. I have always relied upon it to do its job and I will keep it in shape but turns out maybe I need to know just a little bit more. Working on my temping but I confess it is not part of my daily routine yet. DH has been helpful asking me if I've done it which I appreciate but sometimes he gets me after the shower and it's too late at that point... I think? I have more reading and research to do for sure!

No kitties yet. We've talked a lot about them but haven't gone back to the shelter yet... You need to make an appointment every day but Saturday so I think we will go back Saturday afternoon and who knows...

Sorry for the lack of posts, it's just been that kind of a week... I will see if I can write something interesting tomorrow! :-)

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Back to school?

Today is officially my last day of vacation but there are winter storm warnings for where I teach. Overnight they are expecting 6-10 inches of snow so I may have a bonus day. I do need to get back to work though because it turns out I am like the Japanese restaurant at the mall.

I told DH this and he asked me to explain....
See there is this Japanese place at our mall and they make wonderful teryaki chicken. The food is only good though when they are really busy. If it is a slow time of the day and there is no line, you're better off to go somewhere else. When the line is backed up however and they are plating lunches one after another, the food is wonderful and totally worth the wait. I am like the Japanese restaurant.

This week on vacation I have accomplished the bare minimum of what I had set out to do for school. The ammount of work I have done on my national board writing equals what I could have done in 15 minutes while my kids are at art. Everything about me took a vacation and the work I've produced is subpar. I am actually looking forward to getting back to work and being busy again so I have the motivation I need to get my work done.

The good news it that vacation allowed me to get some research done about PCOS and to formulate a baby making plan for the next few months. I began charting and reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility which was totally worth the $24.95. It was a successful vacation then in relation to my homelife but less so in respect to my job. Oh well, I will be back there and immersed in school tomorrow... or Tuesday if the storm hits like they are saying!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Lookng for a new member of the family...

DH brought up the idea of a cat about a month ago. I told myself I wouldn't get involved emotionally but that I'd go and look at a few and then his cat wants would go away. Well they haven't.

Today we went out looking for a cat. I finally let my guard down and fell in love over, and over again. We *think* we have found a kitty (poss 2) at the local shelter, I think we are going back tomorrow to play with them again. I just am not sure I am ready for another cat...

See I had this cat, Gus. He was perfect. I adopted him from a shelter in 2005 and it was love at first cuddle. Gus had lived at the shelter for 8 months and no one could understand why. They called him the fat drunk woman because when you picked him up, he'd put his paws on your shoulders and nuzzle you. He was amazing. Friendly to everyone- I only heard him hiss once and it was deserved. Well Gus left us this summer and being out there today made me admit that I really do need to move on and that Gus is gone. At one point I actually started crying today because Gus was the epitome of the perfect cat. Everyone who knew him says his name with reverence and gets a far off look in their eyes.

This is my Gus.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Hi ICLWers!

Welcome back for another exciting month. I have been participating in ICLW for three months and each month I find lots of new blogs I enjoy reading. I hope you enjoy what you see here. Just some background on me and I hope you'll be back later in the week when I have more interesting things to write about. :-)

DH and I got married July 2007. We wanted to wait a year before TTC but we decided when BCPs ran out at the end of March 2008 that we'd just see what happened. Well what happened was not what we thought....

I didn't get a period at all. I couldn't believe our luck. I was convinced we were pregnant right away. That's what all my parents friends told me for stories. It didn't help that I also gained some weight around that time too. I took many HPTs but wasn't daunted by the negatives- they show false negatives all the time I told myself. Well I went back to the doctor early May to find out what was going on. She took a blood test to check and see if I was pregnant and some other vials to check my hormone levels. About 4 days later the doctor called me herself!!! I took a deep breath ready for her to congratulate me...

There I was standing in my classroom (I teach kindergarten) watching my students out at recess. I was smiling out at them as she told me that not only was I not pregnant, she suspected I had something called PCOS which she told me is the leading cause of infertility among women my age. I sat down and just cried. I remember writing down the acronym and the number for the RE she was going to set me up with. I wasn't even able to call DH right away. My students came in and I got it back together but it was the hardest day of my adult life so far. All I wanted was for the kids to go away so I could do research and then there was the call to DH to make.

I made it through the day and DH was great once I talked with him. We finally got into the RE who is going to help us but it hasn't been easy... and it isn't feeling like it's getting much easier now. I am learning about my body and what PCOS means for me. DH and I took some time off from TTC and went back on BCPs at the advice of our RE but we have abandoned them for now and are trying to learn about my cycles and to find out if I can even ovulate naturally. We are headed back to the RE in April or May to start clomid rounds. Until then, DH and I are doing all we can!

Thanks for reading today. Now you know where I am coming from and where we are hoping to go. I hope you'll come back and visit again! :-)

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Wound Up

Maybe it is the coffee I drank at 6:30. Maybe it is the exciting and hopeful conversation with new friends. Maybe it is that Penelope ate my BBT tonight. Maybe it is just that vacation is coming to an end and I've made a pitiful start on my to-do list. Maybe it is that my fertility friend says I should be ovulating tonight (if I even could ovulate). Whatever it is, I can't sleep.

I am super wound up and even two sleeping pills into it I can't manage to calm down and enjoy a peaceful dream. You might be thinking to yourself, well *T* blogging isn't going to help you take care of any of the things that may be keeping you awake!!! I know but I just can not make myself get going on my NBPTS writing this week. (that is one of the things I have neglected that is seriously stressing me out) The very thought of it makes me sick to my stomach. The problem is then that I am sick doing it and sick thinking about how much I have to do. How's that for sleep preventing stress?!

BLAH!! Well I am off to read more of Lostpedia.... Sweet dreams to YOU!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Facebook

Facebook is my frienemy today. For those of you who don't know the word frienemy it means friend and enemy. My To Do list this week included getting SOLID drafts of ALL my NBPTS writing DONE. Facebook is standing in my way of getting this done. I am sending Maine gifts to my friends, writing posts, updating my status regularly and playing games. It is SO distracting!!! I have even been wondering how I could connect my blog to my facebook- is that really sad??

So Facebook is my friend becuase it is so wicked fun. I am connecting with people I haven't seen in years (although it is sometimes sad that people who were once the most important in my life now keep in touch via status updates) and I am communicating with ease with people who are regulars in my life today. It is also my enemy becuase I really should be getting my writing done. My goal is to mail out my portfolio by March 20th so I may have to block Facebook!!

Facebook my frienemy!!

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Terrific Tuesdays

Today was terrific because:

I was on vacation.
I got to have lunch with my mommy.
I finished up my video taping for NBPTS.
I got a cute new haircut to help me enter this new phase of my life.
I remembered to take my temperature before I got out of bed.
I cooked a brand new dish for dinner tonight and DH clapped for me! (I didn't think to take a picture until after he'd had a second helping).
Bell got spayed today (not so terrific for her but it crosses one thing off my to do list).

YAY For terrific Tuesdays!

Monday, February 16, 2009

V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N

I'm on vacation!! I have been needing this vacation for awhile now. I don't think I was quite ready to go back to school in 09 but now I will get some of the rest and catch up on my work and get back in order....

To Do List for Vacation
  • Get solid drafts of ALL my NBPTS entries.
  • Start temping and charting my cycle.
  • See my friends for lunch.
  • Get Bella fixed.
  • Plan out all of March for my plan book.
  • Clean the house (REALLY CLEAN).
  • Organize the girls' bedroom and file the papers that I've just stacked.
  • Read 1 book for pleasure.
  • File taxes.
  • Sort change in change jar.
If I accomplish all of my vacation goals I will be in good order. Actually today I began to take my temp to help chart my cycles. That was really tough for me to begin because it was admitting to myself that I can't just get pregnant on my own like my friends. It was a tough $9.99 spent but DH has been so encouraging that it was well worth it. He was shocked I didn't come home with the $200 digital ovulation predictor... if only I'd realized that when I was shopping!

Despite my list I feel energized and ready to get started. Because of the holiday today I relaxed and am ready to begin tomorrow. Think happy thoughts!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Food Belly

I have a little food belly this evening. DH has been gone the last couple of evenings getting the Jeep back in working order so tonight he took me out for an early Valentine's day gift. We went to my favorite Italian place (they let you draw on the tables!). We had appetizers, salads, entrees, and dessert. I actually had to unbutton my button down blouse just now. Ahhhhhhhhh I love date nights!

Ok on to MORE reasons why today was terrific... (it IS terrific Tuesday after all!)

I woke up to a beautifully clean house (I cleaned last night while DH was at the shop)
My meeting this morning went very well
I got to my classroom to find a valentine card with Sawyer on it! He offered to make me a mix tape :-) (I love LOST)
My students were amazingly good today
We took 15 minutes to sing and dance this afternoon
DH is home- FINALLY!
Only 3 days until VACATION!

Did YOU have a terrific Tuesday?

Monday, February 9, 2009

One School Forward

I hate forwards. I have a friend who sends a dozen forwards a day and I open maybe one or two of them. This one however I read and it felt so true... If you can't tell I am WAY overdue for February break and just hope that I will make it the next 4 days...

After being interviewed by the school administration, the teaching prospect said, 'Let me see if I've got this right:

“You want me to go into that room with all those kids, correct their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse, monitor their dress habits, censor their T-shirt messages, and instill in them a love for learning. You want me to check their backpacks for weapons, wage war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, and raise their sense of self esteem and personal pride. 'You want me to teach them patriotism and good citizenship, sportsmanship and fair play, and how to register to vote, balance a checkbook, and apply for a job. You want me to check their heads for lice, recognize signs of antisocial behavior, and make sure that they all pass the state exams. 'You want me to provide them with an equal education regardless of their handicaps, and communicate regularly with their parents by letter, telephone, newsletter, and report card. 'You want me to do all this with a piece of chalk, a blackboard, a bulletin board, a few books, a big smile, and a starting salary that qualifies me for food stamps. You want me to do all this and then you tell me.................I CAN'T PRAY”

Quote of the day...

By the mother of the woman who just gave birth to octuplets about her daughter's desire for a big family...

"Instead of becoming a kindergarten teacher or something, she started having them, but not the normal way," he mother said.

Obviously this woman has no idea what it's like to be a kindergarten teacher. I am actually at school right now just shaking my head. The whole story has me riled up but that is by far the craziest quote I have read thus far today.

Recess bell just rang... Back to teaching!

Friday, February 6, 2009

SEE?!

I just read my blog to check my last post came up and I saw that I already posted about my doctor's appointment. Seriously, yesterday is a giant void for me. Will post again when I feel more like myself. BLAH

Not feeling so hot

I broke down and went to the doctor's Wednesday night because the pain in my shoulder had traveled up my neck and into my jaw. I got really scared when I found a lump behind my ear. DH made me call the doctor and we went to get things checked out. I couldn't see my own doctor but I got the most sadistic bastard in the practice. He asked, "does it hurt when I do this?" "Yes!!!!" so he pushed HARDER HELLOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He said it looked like the muscles were knotted and he gave me some muscle relaxers that really screwed me up yesterday. I slept over 19 hours. DH came home at 5:00 and I went to bed at 6:30. It was a really sleepy day. Back to work today though sans muscle relaxers and I am in pain again. Looking forward to spending a weekend that I can't remember thanks to muscle relaxers.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Flat On My Back

And not in a fun way either. Turns out my big fall on Sunday night hurt more than my pride and the pizzas. My back pain and stomach pains (weird huh) have subsided but the neck and shoulder pain has increased. I felt a lump in my neck today and finally decided to go to the doctor. He told me to take the day off tomorrow and enjoy some muscle relaxers with a day of rest trying to get the muscles to unknot. He says if I am not better by the end of the weekend we may have to do PT again. For those of you who don't know, PT stands for Pain and Torture. (Trust me, my sister was a PT major!) Let's just hope it gets better by next week and things can go back to normal.

The good news at the doctor though was when the nurse asked me what medications I was on and I proudly announced NONE! She asked me about BCP and I told her how we stopped them Sunday. She was SO happy for us. She beamed and congratulated us on trying. She even got me my blood results from my PCOS diagnosis and it looks like OPKs will work for me. DH didn't understand lots of the chatter about LH levels and prenatal vitamins but that's ok. She was the first *real* person we've told and she was so excited and hopeful for us. I hope her hope doesn't squish me a few months down the road if we are having trouble but for today, it was what I needed.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Terrific Tuesdays

Happy Terrific Tuesday!! I hope you are all having a terrific day. My day was busy but that just means there was more opportunity to find terrific things...

I had a large Chai Tea from Tim Horton's this morning. They make the BEST Chai Tea.
I stuck to my carb count all day since we are beginning TTC again.
My neck isn't hurting as badly from my fall.
I caught up on all the e-mails that have been patiently waiting for my reply.
I even sent some e-mails of my own for business that needs to be completed.
I got my e-mail account sending from my new laptop- now my Mac is every bit as good as my PC.

So today was terrific. Tomorrow is going to be terrific because we have a juggler coming to our classroom. Now tell me how many of YOU get to have a juggler come to your job and perform?! Why is your Tuesday terrific?

OH OH LATE ENTRY- DH wanted to add his own. He said today is terrific because it's the second day off our BCP so that puts us one day closer to a little baby! GOSH I LOVE THAT MAN!

Monday, February 2, 2009

BINGO and Bruises




BINGO and bruises sums up my Superbowl evening. It all started harmlessly enough, DH and I were hosting for the Superbowl. My parents and sister with her husband all came over at about 5:30. The hot wings were just coming out and my mom and I ran up the street to pick up the pizzas. While we were gone the rest of the family was charged with making up BINGO cards with the commercials they thought would air- the stakes were high!

We got to the pizza place- we had placed the order at 1:00 that afternoon to ensure they were ready for game time but it didn't work out. We milled around and finally the pizzas were done. I carried them out to the car and before I even knew what was happening, I was flat on my back and pizza was everywhere. I love my mom but there is no worse person to be with in a crisis situation. In true panicking mom fashion I wasn't allowed to get up despite the fact that I was halfway under someone's SUV. Finally I just ignored her, got up, took my broken pizzas and went back into the store where I tearfully asked for new pizzas. My mother ran me home right away at which point DH was so mad that they hadn't taken care of the ice in the parking lot so my dad had to go back and pick up the new pizzas.

Once the game started things fell back into place and everyone enjoyed the game but I am still quite sore today. We were all terrible guessers about the commercials aired during the Superbowl and only my mom won but everyone got a prize anyway. It was actually a fun night despite the bruises and I think next year I will volunteer someone else to pick up the food.