Nightmares

I have not been sleeping well. It's not for lack of trying either on mine or DH's parts- he even swapped sides of the bed with me to see if that cured it but nothing has. Last night was one of the most frightening to date...

I dreamed I finally had the babies I've always wanted. Triplets in fact- one girl and identical twin boys. No one would let me at them though. They whisked them away and I felt so helpless. I was allowed to see the boys eventually but my sweet baby girl was kept from me still. I finally found her and she was sick. Hooked up to machines, they told me she wouldn't live. Every time I tried to touch her either I couldn't reach or it would harm her more. I woke up literally heart broken.

These are the types of dreams I am having on a nightly basis even with the aid of sleeping pills and I just can't do it anymore. I am at the point where I don't want to go to bed because I am afraid of what will happen. Not all of my dreams are tragic about my unborn children but they are all stressful and upsetting. I once went through an entire day not speaking to DH because I dreamed he had cheated on me and the hurt and betrayal was so raw I couldn't speak to him.

I am not sure what I can do but I know that if I don't get some quality sleep soon I am going to lose it.