Posts
My husband works in the transportation industry. He called me this afternoon saying I had to call him back immediately. I called on my walk down the hall from class to drama club with 31 kids following me. He said this "I have been exposed to the swine flu. Your parents said you can stay with them, we are not risking you and the baby right now." Choking back tears I hung up because as I said, 31 kids following me like little ducklings down the hallway.
After drama club I called him back to get more information because I am determined NOT to panic about this swine flu thing. Apparently one of his employees MAY have it, we are waiting for the test results. I called my doctor who promised to call right back but that was 1 hr 45 minutes ago. DH and I are now in separate rooms of the house yelling to each other as needed. I am cooking dinner and he will eat somewhere that I am not. This is crazy.
This baby was conceived after doctors told me it wouldn't happen on our own, during an economic depression, and with the threat of swine flu. If this child makes it to term, Goober is going to be the strongest little kiddo alive. It just feels like the odds are really stacked against this pregnancy right now and I am feeling discouraged.... I hope the doctor calls soon to cheer me up and say there's no threat of me getting it, in fact pregnancy makes you immune to the flu! :-)
**Update** The doctor did NOT say that being pregnant makes you immune in fact it makes you slightly more susceptible. I have been advised to stay away from my husband for 48 hours. If the tests come back negative tomorrow then I can go home, if they are positive the doctors need me to call in and I may need to be away for up to 7 days. Not to mention they've already closed a school and daycare near where I teach for the next 7 days.... my father is encouraging me to call my principal right now but I this is just suspected and 3rd hand from me.... Amazing how quickly this is all moving.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Sunday, April 26, 2009
When did you swallow the watermellon seed?
That was the question asked to me last night by a five year old child. That was my first experience with sex ed and made me worry what I am in for in the future!
We had a bonfire last night and among other friends, DH's best friend came over with his daughter and his gf last night. His daughter is 5 which makes us best friends since I teach kindergarten. Sometimes however I enjoy hanging out with the grownups which this child just cannot comprehend.
She was having me haul branches to the fire with her and I had just about had enough so I sat her down and said "Did daddy tell you that I am growing a baby right now? The baby needs my energy so I need to rest right now." She just shook her head no, took me by the hand (I agreed to take ONE last load) and as we walked away she asked "so when did you swallow the watermellon seed?" Ahhhhh if only it had been that simple. I didn't know what to say! When I asked her father he said that's how her real mother explains it... this is a woman who has half a dozen kids by a few different men. When DH's best friend came home from Iraq she was pregnant with another man's child... Clearly this woman is mixed up about the reproductive process! You'd think she'd just stop buying watermellons!!
We had a bonfire last night and among other friends, DH's best friend came over with his daughter and his gf last night. His daughter is 5 which makes us best friends since I teach kindergarten. Sometimes however I enjoy hanging out with the grownups which this child just cannot comprehend.
She was having me haul branches to the fire with her and I had just about had enough so I sat her down and said "Did daddy tell you that I am growing a baby right now? The baby needs my energy so I need to rest right now." She just shook her head no, took me by the hand (I agreed to take ONE last load) and as we walked away she asked "so when did you swallow the watermellon seed?" Ahhhhh if only it had been that simple. I didn't know what to say! When I asked her father he said that's how her real mother explains it... this is a woman who has half a dozen kids by a few different men. When DH's best friend came home from Iraq she was pregnant with another man's child... Clearly this woman is mixed up about the reproductive process! You'd think she'd just stop buying watermellons!!
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
What a day (PG Ment.)
Today was our heartbeat appointment. The doctors estimated me at 11w1d based on my last period (NO ONE LISTENED ABOUT PCOS). So today we went to my OB to hear the heartbeat. We couldn't find it. Trying hard not to panic the doctor sent us immediately to get an ultrasound. We tried to stay calm and DH held my hand the whole way there and kept saying "well now we know we can get pregnant, we will try again as soon as they let us if things don't work out..."
We went in for the US and we saw the baby IMMEDIATELY! I am not as far along as they thought (hmmm maybe now people will listen to me about my irregular periods). I am estimated 9w3d based on length of little Goober. It was amazing to see it and to hear the heartbeat. I just cried and cried. It made it real even though I know we're not out of the woods yet. They printed two pictures for us (will post at a later time). Now we are due November 21 (looks like a turkey!!). But what a relief. My doctor even called me this afternoon to confirm that I understood everything and I will go back in a 3 more weeks to try to hear the heart again.
This whole thing has just felt so surreal and I've been waiting for someone to tell me it's a trick but today I saw it with my own eyes (I've been feeling the effects for a few weeks now) and we saw and heard the heartbeat and saw our Goober move. Although I understand that we are still in the first trimester and have a long way to go, today made it so much more real.
We went in for the US and we saw the baby IMMEDIATELY! I am not as far along as they thought (hmmm maybe now people will listen to me about my irregular periods). I am estimated 9w3d based on length of little Goober. It was amazing to see it and to hear the heartbeat. I just cried and cried. It made it real even though I know we're not out of the woods yet. They printed two pictures for us (will post at a later time). Now we are due November 21 (looks like a turkey!!). But what a relief. My doctor even called me this afternoon to confirm that I understood everything and I will go back in a 3 more weeks to try to hear the heart again.
This whole thing has just felt so surreal and I've been waiting for someone to tell me it's a trick but today I saw it with my own eyes (I've been feeling the effects for a few weeks now) and we saw and heard the heartbeat and saw our Goober move. Although I understand that we are still in the first trimester and have a long way to go, today made it so much more real.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Emotional Health
I don't think I ever honored the effect that a diagnosis of IF and PCOS had on my mental health. I am constantly amazed at just how detrimental that was to my self concept and my happiness...
Today I went to my OB and new PCP for the first time. It was an appointment wiht the OB nurse but I did meet the doctor, and the nurse treated me like I was "normal." She did not understand the magnitude of what we've been through emotionally to get to this point, nor did she understand my anxiety over the sketchy answers I was given at my last doctor's office. it was so nice to have a nurse have hope and faith in me.
We went over the prenatal blood work I had done and she said everything was fine (PHEW) but then I asked her what my hCG number was and if it was still climbing appropriately and she said they didn't even give me a pregnancy test they just assumed I knew what I was talking about. I immediately began to panic because although I've had all the symptoms my old doctor was not confident. When she called to "confirm" she said, well teh numbers went up. I asked "Does that mean I am pregnant?" she said "yup" (VERY unenthusiastic) and so I asked "can I get excited?" and she said "yup" (also unenthusiastic). It was such a let down. It almost felt as if they didn't want me to be pregnant. They told me I couldn't and that they couldn't help me and refered me to the RE and when I went to confirm the pregnancy they were unenthusiastic and it felt as if they were reluctant to give me the blood work after the urine test at 4:00pm (when I was only 4 weeks along) came back negative. They were detrimental to my mental and emotional well being in relation to my fertility. I am so glad to be done with them.
Because I was panicking after I left the Dr.'s office I went and bought another HPT and peed on it as soon as I got home (ironically at 4:00 today) it said pregnant almost immediately so I relaxed and let the nausea wash over me. I just simply cannot believe how my FORMER doctor's office treated this whole situation. I am so relieved to be working with a doctor who has hope for the future of my family and said a BIG congrautlations upon meeting me today. I cannot wait to go back in 12 days and 12 hours to hear the heartbeat. I barely held it together today talking about the schedule of appointments and what I need to do, I will be a basketcase (but in a good way) on heartbeat day. Hoping for a strong one- then people at work can know and I can stop trying to suck in my stomach wherever I go and can embrace the fact that my pants are tightening at an alarming rate.
Today I went to my OB and new PCP for the first time. It was an appointment wiht the OB nurse but I did meet the doctor, and the nurse treated me like I was "normal." She did not understand the magnitude of what we've been through emotionally to get to this point, nor did she understand my anxiety over the sketchy answers I was given at my last doctor's office. it was so nice to have a nurse have hope and faith in me.
We went over the prenatal blood work I had done and she said everything was fine (PHEW) but then I asked her what my hCG number was and if it was still climbing appropriately and she said they didn't even give me a pregnancy test they just assumed I knew what I was talking about. I immediately began to panic because although I've had all the symptoms my old doctor was not confident. When she called to "confirm" she said, well teh numbers went up. I asked "Does that mean I am pregnant?" she said "yup" (VERY unenthusiastic) and so I asked "can I get excited?" and she said "yup" (also unenthusiastic). It was such a let down. It almost felt as if they didn't want me to be pregnant. They told me I couldn't and that they couldn't help me and refered me to the RE and when I went to confirm the pregnancy they were unenthusiastic and it felt as if they were reluctant to give me the blood work after the urine test at 4:00pm (when I was only 4 weeks along) came back negative. They were detrimental to my mental and emotional well being in relation to my fertility. I am so glad to be done with them.
Because I was panicking after I left the Dr.'s office I went and bought another HPT and peed on it as soon as I got home (ironically at 4:00 today) it said pregnant almost immediately so I relaxed and let the nausea wash over me. I just simply cannot believe how my FORMER doctor's office treated this whole situation. I am so relieved to be working with a doctor who has hope for the future of my family and said a BIG congrautlations upon meeting me today. I cannot wait to go back in 12 days and 12 hours to hear the heartbeat. I barely held it together today talking about the schedule of appointments and what I need to do, I will be a basketcase (but in a good way) on heartbeat day. Hoping for a strong one- then people at work can know and I can stop trying to suck in my stomach wherever I go and can embrace the fact that my pants are tightening at an alarming rate.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Missing
Yup, I've been missing lately. At night I just do not have the energy to blog- plus I don't really know what to say. Also I've been incredibly busy despite National Boards being completed...
I started teaching at my local college. Only two people have been to the class- the rest of them dropped before we even began. In the interest of saving money the college dropped me back to one night a week and are only paying me half of what they promised but I still have to cover all the material, just in half the sessions. Honestly, I feel like it's a good compromise. I wanted to just have them cancel the class, but DH is right, this is great experience and I can see if I like higher ed. We can also use the money for all the medical expenses coming our way.
Drama club is in full swing right now and that keeps me out one night a week. This year's group is actually coming together AWESOME. I cannot wait for the play. My life continues to be hectic and crazy but I have April break in two more weeks. That will give me a chance to rest and relax. Then all my commitments are done after May 20th. Phew
I started teaching at my local college. Only two people have been to the class- the rest of them dropped before we even began. In the interest of saving money the college dropped me back to one night a week and are only paying me half of what they promised but I still have to cover all the material, just in half the sessions. Honestly, I feel like it's a good compromise. I wanted to just have them cancel the class, but DH is right, this is great experience and I can see if I like higher ed. We can also use the money for all the medical expenses coming our way.
Drama club is in full swing right now and that keeps me out one night a week. This year's group is actually coming together AWESOME. I cannot wait for the play. My life continues to be hectic and crazy but I have April break in two more weeks. That will give me a chance to rest and relax. Then all my commitments are done after May 20th. Phew
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)